Thursday, April 23, 2009

Say what you mean!

In the spirit of Bill Maher's segment "New Rules," I'd like to point out an annoying speech pattern working its way into the American vernacular:

kinda (sometimes sorta)

That will be just about enough of that, thank you. We are living lives, people. Our lives are composed of many things. Those things are what they are.

They aren't kinda what they are. They aren't sorta what they are. They fucking are what they fucking are.

If you have to use kinda or sorta when you're having a conversation, you need to start reading a dictionary. Try keeping one by the toilet. You see, the beautiful thing abour our language is that many words comprise it (don't get me started on the proper way to use comprise). The reason for all of these words is they all have different meanings.

To simplify: if you say, "This chicken is, I don't know, kinda bland," you really mean, "This chicken is bad." Say what you mean! Grow a pair, damn it.

I believe this mindset - this inability to express one's opinion - is indicative of a society that has lost its focus. Folks are scared to say anything concrete. It's the pussy-fication of America.

"The movie was kinda long." No, the movie sucked.

"He's sorta opinionated." Actually, he's a raging asshole.

"She's kinda hot in a sorta cute way." She doesn't even have a good sense of humor! RUN!!!

Say what you mean.

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